That’s not love. That thought has been on repeat in my head ever since we accepted our first foster placement 11 months ago. How do you explain love – true love – agape love – to a child who has mostly only experienced selfish “love.” I can barely even bring myself to say “selfish love” because, if it’s selfish, is it really love?
So, here we are, trying to teach a person how to love. It’s hard. Because love, much like C.S. Lewis continually teaches, is a choice, not a feeling. I’ve been fortunate, I’ve never had to fight very hard for love. Kevin and I have had a fun-filled marriage and drama-free dating relationship. I love him easily every day. In fact, my love for him has grown over the past year. But when the Lord adds a person to your house, even temporarily, love is a choice. I have to choose love even when told I’m hated. Because, as the refrain in my head goes, most of the love that was shown to her wasn’t loving.