Do Not Awaken Love


Kevin and I started dating three years ago this month. Within our first week as “girlfriend and boyfriend,” he told me that we needed to discuss something very important. We sat at a table in the middle of our university’s cafeteria and he told me that we needed to be certain to set boundaries in our relationship. That was no problem for me – I was completely supportive of verbalizing our boundaries. But then he said something really strange to me – he said we needed to talk about all three categories of boundaries.

Woah Woah Woah. Three? How are there three categories of boundaries? I really and truly was stumped.

Kevin patiently explained to me that the three categories of boundaries are: physical, spiritual, and emotional. He told me to take a week to think through and pray about our boundaries and that we would reconvene to discuss them.

I knew I needed professional help! So I did what I encourage everyone in a dating relationship to do – I sought out an accountability partner that was at least a step ahead of me in the process.

Last week at youth group, on Valentine’s Eve, Kevin divided the genders so that we could talk about dating relationships.

I had the opportunity to dialogue with the girls in our youth group about these three categories of relationships.

We used a quote as well as a Bible verse to frame our mindset for this topic.

“How much better it is to grow the tree straight when it is young than try to straighten a bent tree when it is old.”

and we used this Bible verse

“Do not stir or awaken love until the appropriate time.” – Song of Solomon 2:7 and 3:5

My next three blogs will be the outpouring of both this conversation with Kevin as well as the outline from my Wednesday night talk. Check back to get the full story!

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About the author

Renae Adelsberger
Renae Adelsberger

Renae lives in Jackson, Tennessee with her husband Kevin. She works in insurance and teaches middle school girls Sunday school. She has a desire to see young women grow in Christ, she writes and speaks to that end.

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